The state department recently learned that when failed President, Donald Trump, left the White House, he walked off with his love letters to North Korean dictator, Kim Jung Un. A short time ago, the state department retrieved the stolen letters from Mara Lago. Several letters are now open to the public. This is the first in a series of missives from the former President to the Korean dictator, and Kim Jung Un’s response to Donald Trump.
Dearest Kimmy,
My love for you exceeds any love I ever felt for my cold fish of a wife, Melania. The Slovakian wench wouldn’t even hold my hand. You, Kimmy, held my hand at the Korean Border. For the first time in my life, I knew what love was all about. Your hand was warm and inviting. Now, the DOJ is closing in on me, Kimmy. They’re going to slap the steel bracelets on my wrists and haul me off to the Old Gray Bar Hotel. Please Kimmy, let me live with you at your palace in Pyongyang. I won’t bring Eric; you have my word. I’ll just bring tons of love and my golden toilette.
Hugs, Love, and Smooches,
Donny T
Dearest Donny,
I also felt warmth and true love when our hands touched at the Korean Border. In fact, I was so overwhelmed with love that day, I only executed 47 close friends and relatives. Donny my lad, you know that my bedroom door is always open to you at the Presidential Palace at Pyongyang. I hope you can steal away before the DOJ slaps those steel bracelets on your wrists. By the way, I’m looking forward to using your golden toilette, and I’m glad you won’t be bringing Eric.
Forever Yours,
Love and Kisses
Kimmy