The Running Man

Uberdeep is the only way to describe the conversation I had with the former governor of California during the filming of Running Man. Arnold: “Nice shoes.” Me: “Likewise, I’m sure.”

Patch Adams

In Patch Adams, I had the privilege of working with academy award winners, Robin Williams and Phillip Seymour Hoffman. In the film, I was dressed in a lab coat, like the one Robin is wearing in the poster. Robin looks like a doctor; I look like a butcher or a hair stylist wearing a stethoscope.

Punch Line

I’m laughing in this photo, because when I arrived on the set, I told Sally Fields I’d been a fan since her Flying Nun days. Sally stared at me as though she was about to say, “I appreciate your comments, but go away before I call security.”

Baby Boom

Diane Keaton was a peach.

Cross My Heart

Martin Short is a national treasure. Without question, one of the funniest human beings on the planet. On the film Cross Your Heart with Annette O’Toole, Martin and I did dueling Jerry Lewis’ . I love the guy.

Dragnet

It was an honor to work with Christopher Plummer and Dan Ackroyd on Dragnet. My part consisted of running around in goat leggings at midnight carrying a fiery torch that nearly set my mustache aflame. Now I know how the villagers in the original Frankenstein movie felt.

Metro

I played a cop in the motion picture Metro starring Eddie Murphy and Michael Rappaport. While we were shooting, a klieg light broke loose and bounced off an extra’s head. She wasn’t hurt badly, but just the same they took her away in an ambulance. If I got bonked on the head with a klieg light and was taken away in an ambulance, I would return in a starring role or own part of the production company.

Silent Night Deadly Night II

Silent Night Deadly Night Part II is possibly the worst horror film ever made. You’re welcome.

The Right Stuff

Working on The Right Stuff was a gift from the Gods.

Commando Squad

On more than one occasion during the filming of Commando Squad I was nearly blown to bits. You’re welcome.

The Woman in Red

Working with Gene Wilder and Gilda Radner on The Woman in Red was a blast. Gilda was the fourth member of the original SNL players that I had the privilege of meeting; Gene Wilder was in Young Frankenstein and Blazing Saddles. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Who’s That Girl

While I was working on the film Who’s That Girl, I had lunch with Madonna. Well … me and fifty-seven other people, but it was still cool.