I was born on the southside of Brooklyn a few years after the second world war. My father was stationed in Nebraska during World War II and often said, “I killed more German and Japanese soldiers with my typewriter than any other guy in the Army Air Corp.” Still in single digits, I thought Dad went around smashing his Underwood over enemy combatants’ heads, or dropped his typewriter from a B17 into densely populated areas of Berlin and Tokyo. Although my father was never in the thick of it, he still suffered from PTSD, or shell shock as the medicos called the disorder in the 1940s. Why he exhibited symptoms of the dread condition is a mystery; nonetheless, after his stint in the armed forces, Dad had more issues than Readers Digest. Of course, cohabitating with my mother, the Sicilian whack-a-do from Crazy Town, may have been a contributing factor regarding his facial tics and occasional melt downs; events that punctuated a broad-spectrum of clumsy parenting. Just the same, I never doubted his love. A few years back, the veteran shuffled off this mortal coil in his 96th year. In his absence, I thank my father and his heroic band of brothers who fought and died for their country.
Tag Archives: Videos
Black American Hero’s
Here is a clever idea from the button-down mind of my lovely wife, Millisa. Recently, the folks at Quaker Oats and Mars Nutrition woke up after 130 years and discontinued their stereotypical logos from the company’s pancake mix and fragrant white rice. Millisa said, “The Quaker Oat Company and Mars Nutrition should replace Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima with a bit of Black History on every box of pancake mix and white rice. It would be a heartfelt gesture toward eradicating racism and bigotry around the world. Every month (or at least every February) the mega-corporations could highlight Frederick Douglas or Martin Luther King Jr. Perhaps Miles Davis or Rosa Parks. The list is endless. To those corporations, I would underline that there is no time like the present to make a contribution and not just money.”
Injustice Flourishes in the Darkness of Inattention
We begin with viewers who watch this broadcast for six seconds before switching to a cat running up drapes, a monkey tossing turds at someone’s granny, and a rat waltzing a slice of pizza down subway stairs. To those Instagramsters viewing Phake Breaking News for a brief moment, may I just say stay tuned a tad longer; I can assure you your time will be well-spent. Plus, when this telecast has concluded, Mr. Whiskers will still be racing up curtains, the mischievous monkey in the zoo will be lobbing turds at granny, and ratatouille boy will be hopping down the subway stairs with a slice of Ray’s pizza locked in his germ-ridden jaws. In an unrelated story, Dwayne Elgin, a prolific writer with a large brain recently wrote: “Injustice flourishes in the darkness of inattention.” Seven words worth repeating: “Injustice flourishes in the darkness of inattention.” Temporary President Trump is an uncommon pickpocket stealing our Democracy and undermining our way of life. He is in fact the divider-in-chief. We are better than this. One of the brilliant architects of the Constitution, Thomas Jefferson, wrote in his journal: “Eternal vigilance is the cost of freedom.” We must pay attention and keep vigilant. This just in, apparently my pizza delivery just arrived at the studio. Until we meet again. Film at eleven.
Tarradiddles and Mooncalves
Today’s breaking news concerns the continuing blitzkrieg of Trump supporters leaping from the sinking Republican Party like rats jumping off a coffin descending beneath the waves. Earlier today, Bay Area reporter, John Baskett, spoke with Berkeley resident and former Trump follower, Saul Grabiotti. Mr. Grabiotti said and I quote: “When I voted for Donald Trump, I lost my soul. Losing my soul wasn’t like losing my keys; I never found my soul under the sofa.” Our Bay Area correspondent learned that several people who tolerated Saul’s dark heart for decades, recently chipped in and bought him a sense of humor for his birthday. “Now, I appreciate how funny Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel, and Bill Mayer have been all these years,” Mr. Grabiotti added. “They’re brilliant comedians and they speak to the truth.” I must say, it’s refreshing to hear a Trump tarradiddle admitting he’s been behaving like an utter mooncalf. With that said, it won’t be long before every Trump supporter realizes what a douchebag Temporary President Trump is every time he opens his pie hole. Speaking of douchebags, tarradiddles, and mooncalves; in a related story, former Trump campaign manager and convicted felon, Paul Manafort, is currently looking at an eighty-five year stretch in a Federal penitentiary. In the words of another Don’s right-hand-man, Peter Clemenza, “Oh, you won’t be seeing Pauly no more; take the gun and leave the cannolis.” Film at eleven.