Monthly Archives: April 2016

Drumpf to Trump

hitlerJohn Oliver researched the origin of Trump’s name and found that his great grandfather changed it from Drumpf to Trump when the old gentleman arrived on Ellis Island from Dusseldorf. Apparently, his great-grandfather made Lederhosen for parade goers during Oktoberfest. The pants maker studied law when he came to America. His first name was Isodore, or Uncle Izzy as he was affectionately called. But Izzy Drumpf wasn’t a very good lawyer, so he kept the tailor shop open while he was practicing law; therefore, you might say that Izzy Drumpf was fitting and fighting suits simultaneously.

Marco Rubio’s Disappearing Act

rubio trump cruzSince the senator from Florida did everyone a favor when he dropped out of the presidential race; children frolicking in swimming pools in Miami have replaced Marco Pollo with Marco Rubio. Now, if we could just close our eyes and Republican front runners Ted Cruz and Donald Trump would disappear as well, the world would be a better place.

Anderson Cooper Vs Donald Trump

anderson cooperAt a town hall meeting, Anderson Cooper asked Donald Trump why he had said nasty things about Senator Ted Cruz’s wife, Heidi. “Ted started it, ” Mr. Trump replied, petulantly. ” What are you five years old?” Anderson Cooper said. “Your response is ‘Ted started it?'” Personally, I’m concerned that President Trump may be attending a high level meeting with President Putin of Russia, when the two leaders find themselves in disagreement. There’s bound to be an international incident when President Trump stamps his feet and proclaims: “Shut up, Vladimir, you poopy head. You’re not the boss of me.”